你可以跌倒，但请记得怎么站起来(2)

时间：2024-11-01 03:48:45 学人智库我要投稿

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你可以跌倒，但请记得怎么站起来(2)

　　5. Stop comparing ourself to others. We’re on a unique path

　　不要和别人比较，我们都是独一无二的

　　A sure fire, 100% guaranteed way to get discouraged is to focus onother people in a comparative way. Here is why: we generally see theirvictories, successes, and strengths. We see what they have and what we don’t. We see why they are better than us. When wedo this we get discouraged and we feel sorry for ourselves. We don’t as easily see their struggles, their fears,their setbacks, and their failures.

　　毫无疑问，一直把自己和别人比较绝对会让我们低落。为什么呢：我们往往看到的都是他们的成果、成功和优点。我们看到的是他们有我们却没有的部分，我们看到的是为什么他们比我们优秀。一旦这样，我们就很容易感到失望为自己感到难受。同时，我们很少去关注他们的挣扎、害怕，挫折和失败。

　　So don’t do it. It isn’t empowering. Don’t compare. We are on a unique path. It is great to be inspired byanother, but if by hearing another’sstory, we feel that we are lesser, then we need to just focus on our own path.

　　所以不要这样了，这只会让你更加泄气。不要比较，我们都是独一无二的存在着。让别人去激励你固然好，但如果别人的故事让你觉得自身有所不足，那么只需要专注自己就好了。

　　6. Detach from rewards, focus on our actions and giving our bestwork

　　忘掉所谓的奖赏，专注于行动，付出最大的努力

　　If our sole motivation for doing something is the reward that wemight get from the action, then we are setting ourselves up for discouragement.Action should be its own reward. When it is, we are forever free. Freedom is atthe heart of happiness. When we don’tneed someone else’s praise for doingsomething, when we don’t need a “carrot”for performing our work, then we are truly free to just focus on our work andmake it great. When we create great work we are happy.

　　如果我们做某件事唯一的动力在于可能会获得的奖赏，那么我们就不知觉走上了一条失望之路。行为本身就值得被奖赏。这样一来，我们永远都是“自由之身”，自由是幸福的核心。如果在做一件事时不需要别人的褒奖，也不需要对工作肯定的奖励，那么我们就真的能够专注于工作做到最好。一旦取得进步会非常开心。

　　7. Change our “rules” for being happy

　　改变自己的“规定”获得幸福

　　What rule do we have to be happy? What has to happen for us to feelsuccessful? Is it in our control? If it isn’t then we might be setting ourselves up for failure. By rules I meanthe set of circumstances that must be present for us to feel accomplished.

　　什么时候会感到幸福?发生什么样的事情会让我们觉得成功?这在我们的掌控之中么?如果不是，那我们也许就把自己推向了失败的不归路。所谓的规定，我指的是一些必须能让我们感到成功的特定场景。

　　We have to create rules that serve us. We have to live by rules thatare within our control. Here are some of my rules: I am successful when I growand improve. I am successful when I give my very best.

　　我们需要为自己制造规定，我们需要遵循这些可以由自己掌控的规则。比如我的规则是：只要我成长进步就是成功，只要我付出努力就是成功。

　　8. Consider who we are spending time with

　　想想我们该花时间和谁在一起

　　The people who we spend the most time with might be a majorcontributing factor to feeling discouragement. This can be a very hard one,especially if those people are family and loved ones. We have a tendency tobecome who we most frequently associate with, and if we spend all our time withpeople who are constantly negative, and feeling sorry for themselves, we can beinfluenced to see life through a similar lens.

　　和我们相处最久的那些人也许是带来沮丧的最大因素。这听起来不大舒服，尤其是他们会是家人或爱人。我们总会不知觉的变成身边最亲近人的样子，如果我们一直和消极的人在一起，为他们感到难过，我们也会被影响和他们一样去看待生活。

　　So what can we do? We can’tsimply cut loved ones out of our lives. So what we should do is simply expandour social network. Join a peer group that is positive. Start to surroundourselves with positive people as a balance. Over time we will start to take ontheir mindset and this will help with any feelings of discouragement we mayhave.

　　那该怎么办呢?我们不能简单的把爱人排除在生活之外。所以能做的就是扩大自己的社交圈。加入积极的同龄人小组。让周围充满了正能量的人作为平衡。不知不觉我们就会吸取这些正能量，也能帮助我们减少沮丧感。

　　9. Get outside, move and breathe

　　出去活动一下，呼吸新鲜空气

　　Fresh air and sunshine can have an amazing effect on our feelings.Sometimes when we are feeling down, all that we need to do is simply to gooutside and breathe. Movement and exercise is also a fantastic way to feelbetter. Positive emotions can be generated by motion. So if we start to feeldown, take some deep breathes, go outside, feel the fresh air, let the sun hitour face, go for a hike, a walk, a bike ride, a swim, a run, whatever. We willfeel better if we do this.

　　新鲜空气和阳光真的能给我们带来不一样的感受。当我们觉得沮丧时，只需要简单的走出去呼吸新鲜空气。运动锻炼能让心情变好，好的心情能带来更多积极的情绪。如果我们觉得低落，那么就深呼吸，去郊外看看，感受新鲜的空气，享受阳光的沐浴、远足、散步、骑车或是游泳跑步，什么都可以。只有这样做绝对会很开心。

　　10. Talk to our mentor

　　和导师对话

　　Our mentor can be a great source of wisdom when we are feeling down.So when discouragement rears its ugly head, go have a coffee with our mentor.They will be able to give us wisdom based on experience. In many cases theywill also give us tough love and help us to snap out of it if we are feelingsorry for ourselves. They will also help us to make a specific plan of actionto work our way out of discouragement.

　　在沮丧时，导师是我们最大的智慧之源。所以当失落感悄然到来，跟导师一起喝杯咖啡吧。他们能够根据自己的经验给我们一些智慧提示。很多时候，他们给予我们的爱和关怀能帮助我们走出自卑，也会帮我们制定详细的计划来走出沮丧。

　　11. Go find someone who we can help

　　去找那些需要我们帮助的人

　　This is a great way to alleviate discouragement. Go find someone whoneeds help, and then help them. It is really that simple. When we serve others,when we go out of our way to help other people in need, we feel better. It isimpossible to be discouraged when we are giving all our efforts on behalf ofanother. Discouragement is a really a self-driven symptom. We are focusing onourselves. That is why we feel bad. However, when we stop thinking aboutourselves, and when we direct our attention to another, we feel better.

　　这是减少沮丧最好的方式。找那些需要帮助的人，然后帮助他们吧。这真的非常简单。在服务别人的时候，在帮助那些需要帮助的人时，我们也会开心。当全身心的帮助他人，从他人角度想问题时，沮丧也就不复存在了。沮丧是一个内化的情感，当我们只关注自己时才会有如此糟糕的感觉。然而当我们停止考虑自己，开始转向帮助别人的时候，一切都好起来了。

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